So I met a guy... I know. After all these journal entries and songs and poems about the last one killing me a little every day, why would I even bother with a new one? Whose to say he won't just turn out like the last disaster? No one really, he quite easily could. This is how the last relationship started. Innocent, beautiful, lovely, full of giggles and little kisses and smiles. Full of compliments and "No you're more adorable."'s . Then things went dark, then the fights started, and the cheating, and the hitting. Whose to say this won't turn out like the last one? Well, that would be me.

I won't let it happen again. I can't. Besides... Maybe I'm naive, maybe I'm childish, but I can't see him doing that to me. But, then again, maybe I'm just naive. I'm sure I thought that about the last guy too.

Point is though, this guy makes me beyond happy. For once, my mind is off the troubles of my past. When I'm with him, I stop thinking about the last guy, I stop thinking about my past. And we talk. We talk for hours, and never run out of things to say for very long. Its unbelievable how much we have in common, and haven't had one little disagreement since the day we met. I wouldn't change a single little damn thing.

And he's a musician. There's something about musicians that I either love or hate. I love it. I haven't even heard him play, and I think he's amazing. I don't care, I know he is. He's perfect. I hate looking people in the eye, I can't stand it, but I could stare into his bright blue eyes for hours. And play with his perfect shaggy hair. Or run my fingers down his back, and feel his body against mine in bed. It's amazing, it really is.

Maybe I'm just being a bit too girly, I don't know. I can't remember the last time I felt like this. This.. childish, innocent puppy love that I generally despise with every fiber of my being.

But that doesn't make my problems go away. That doesn't make the last guy go away. I'm still torn up that I didn't do anything. I finally told him about the last guy, why we broke up and why it's taking me a bit longer than usual to get over it. He said he would never do that to me, and maybe I'm being stupid but I believe him. But I'm still scared half to death. I got up the courage to add him as my new boyfriend on Facebook. The most public of places. Now, should my ex want to, contacting him is a click away.

Ruining everything is a click away.